Mary Pat

On the Occasion of Mary Pat’s Funeral Service, 19 August 2022

From Marcus Aurelius’ Meditations:

“The duration of a person’s life is only an [instant]; our substance is flowing away this very moment; the senses are dim; the composition of the body is decaying, the soul is chaos, our fate is unknowable, and reputation uncertain. In a word, all bodily things are like a flowing river, and everything of the soul is dream and smoke, and life is all warfare and a stranger’s wanderings, and the reward is oblivion. What then could possibly guide us? Only one thing: [acting in accordance with Nature which means] keeping the divine spirit within each of us free from disrespect and harm, above pains and pleasures, doing nothing aimlessly or falsely … accepting all that may happen and is allotted to us as coming from that [divine] source, whatever it is, from which we ourselves came. It consists in awaiting death with a contented mind, as nothing other than a liberation of those elements of which a living being is composed.”  (2:17)

In this passage, Marcus draws our attention to Nature and the divinity within each of us. We gather here to honor Mary Patricia in this magnificent setting, next to a flowing River and towering Mountains made ever so slightly higher by the ashes of one Thomas Francis Jeremiah. The natural processes that gave us these gifts will now accept the ashes of our sister. May she one day renew and nourish the trees and grasses around her in thanks for the life that Nature and the Creator bestowed upon her.

An essential part of Marcus’ understanding of the divine spirit is mankind’s natural inclination to kindness. At her core, Mary Pat epitomized this divinity. Much to our chagrin, she gave money from her pittance to friends and neighbors in need. She turned a blind eye to those who would take from her. Over the last few years, she would deflect our conversations about her health into a discussion about the welfare of her brothers and sisters and our extended families. Sympathy and empathy dominated her brain’s activity. As a final example of her divine kindness, she managed to expel the words “I’m sorry” to all of her siblings gathered around her death bed. Sorry for what? Sorry that we all had to travel to see her in this state. Sorry that she had inconvenienced us. Even in her dying thoughts, her concern was for others.

Mary would want us to thank all of you who have helped her through the years - her neighbors and friends who watched out for her, her care givers, and her social services angels who performed miracles on her behalf. We thank you all. For most of us, the brief shout of our lives echo only in the walls of the people we touch. Know that your shouts resonated in Mary Pat.

For my brothers and sisters, with Mary’s passing, so begins Nature’s parade for the rest of us. Just as we did for Mary Pat, when our time comes, we will continue to gather to bundle in love our flesh and blood. We will do this because our bond with each other dissolves our differences. We will do this because the Maypole wished it.

And finally I say to Mary Pat: “Recall to your mind all that you have passed through and all that you have been able to endure; and that the story of your life [has] come to an end, and your duty [has been] accomplished. Recall, too, all the beautiful things you have seen and how many pleasures and pains you have seen through, how many honors you have turned away from, and how much unkindness you have repaid with kindness.”  (5:31)

God speed Mary Pat. Say “hi” to Mom and Dad for us.